Google CEO Larry Page Says "Nothing Seriously Wrong" 88
After Larry Page bowed out from some public appearances, reader Pigskin-Referee writes with the news that "Google Inc Chief Executive Larry Page has reassured employees about his health, but the company on Friday shed little additional light on an unspecified condition affecting his voice that will sideline him from two high-profile events in the coming weeks. Page told employees in an email on Thursday that there was 'nothing seriously wrong with me,' according to a source who had seen an internal staff memo. The 39-year-old Google co-founder sat out his company's annual shareholders' meeting on Thursday because he had 'lost his voice,' according to Google Executive Chairman Eric Schmidt, who informed attendees of the news at the start of the event."
Page Should Take Inspiration from His Role Model (Score:5, Funny)
Darth Vader did most of his best work after he lost his voice. I mean, c'mon, his focus is on Doing Evil, not singing friggin' madrigals, let's not make too much of this...
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You can take a page out of his life, but you can't take life out of Page.
I Call Nose Job! (Score:2)
Let's face it, when famous rich people "publically disapear" for a few weeks because of an "unspoken medical malady" but still have their regular e-presence, they've most likely "had work done."
Just wait three weeks and then tell him "it looks so natural, and your eyes don't look permanently surprised at all dude" when you see him next. 8-)
That or the problem is "unspeakable" for being trivially "yuchy", like a ruptured hemiroid.
It's really pointless to debate it all, as both serious and trivial/embarrassin
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not singing friggin' madrigals
For this, you win the Internets.
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I've heard that before..... (Score:1, Insightful)
Isn't that what Steve Jobs said in the beginning too?
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I'll eat your wife for free.
i'm not sure if he means cannibal-wise, or vagina-wise. Either way, no thanks!
Thanks for all the concern (Score:1, Interesting)
What else 'matters' for fucks sake.
Don't tell me there isn't a serious mancrush going on here.
I hate shareholders (Score:5, Interesting)
"Oh. My. GOD. HE'S NOT IMMORTAL! He suffers minor illnesses like we do! THE COMPANY IS DOOMED! DOOMED! DOOOOOOOOOOMED! Somebody reassure us he's not dead already! HE'S BEEN DEAD ALL ALONG, HASN'T HE?!? Why do these terrible things have to happen to us? Whyyyyyyyyyyyy"
God, do I hate shareholders.
Re:I hate shareholders (Score:5, Insightful)
Honestly I'm convinced you could replace a typical CEO with either a monkey or magic 8 ball and get similar results.
Re:I hate shareholders (Score:5, Insightful)
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The blocks in that picture look more line mini mega blocks than duplo to me (stud pitch is the same but studs are taller)
Re:I hate shareholders (Score:4, Insightful)
And I'm honestly convinced that if the typical Slashdotter or man-on-the-street who makes this kind of asinine comment were given free rein to replace a typical CEO they'd decimate the company's value within a month, if they didn't have half the top executives resign first.
What do you think it actually takes to run a company? Tell me - if it's that easy, this should be trivial. Here, I'll get you started:
* Knowledge of accounting - yes, you need this no matter what industry you're in. You simply MUST understand capital versus expense, A/R and A/P, GAPP, ratios, asset depreciation, etc. Yes, you have a CFO - but you'd better know what they're talking about
* Knowledge of risk management.
* Extremely detailed and extremely broad knowledge of the industry you're in.
Drat, trackpad pressed "submit" (Score:5, Informative)
Okay, starting again...
* Knowledge of accounting - yes, you need this no matter what industry you're in. You simply MUST understand capital versus expense, A/R and A/P, GAPP, ratios, asset depreciation, etc. Yes, you have a CFO - but you'd better know what they're talking about
* Knowledge of risk management.
* Extremely detailed and extremely broad knowledge of the industry you're in.
* Knowledge of the *market* of your industry
* Strong analytics
* Strong skills in prioritizing
* Ability to explain very technical aspects of your industry to the layman
* Strategic wisdom
* Be a motivator
* Know where to ask for answers if you don't have them
* Ability to keep your mouth shut when necessary (talking to politicians and lobbyists, for instance)
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Or are you honestly going to sit there and tell me "Developers developers developers developers" was motivating?
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Extremely detailed and extremely broad knowledge of the industry you're in.
Is that why you get these vastly overpaid "superstar" CEOs that move from industry to industry? CEOs are incredibly overpaid for the supply and demand for their position, probably for a few reasons.
One, it's a single position so the company can afford to spend a lot. Two, there's a lot of quid pro quo going on with the foxes guarding the henhouse.
And three, people aren't good judges of how valuable a person really is, along with the psychology that the CEO is an important position, so it must be worth lots
If microsoft had used the 8ball (Score:2)
Everything would be different, after all, the Magic 8-Ball has always known... Outlook not so good...
no voice.. (Score:5, Funny)
no voice means Page has been reduced to ... (puts on sunglasses) ... a paragraph!
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So.. does he have to make a stupid pun whenever he toggles his shades, or does he just toggle his shades whenever a snarky pun about the victim of the week comes to mind?
The former would explain why he wears them indoors so much, but then again, so would the glass-walled police station with huge banks of yellow lamps all over the place.
IRC (Score:4, Funny)
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Robot speak (Score:5, Insightful)
Lost his voice? That doesn't seem to make Hawking miss any meetings...
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What's wrong (Score:1)
is that he is in charge of jumping the shark with google.
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I'm guessing he was actually at a strip club in which he was writing off as a "business meeting".
If that had happened, him being in the club enjoying the show would be all over youtub... uhh, never mind.
How Watergate burglers got caught (Score:2)
The conspiratorial side of this was getting silly (Score:3)
The suggestions that he wasn't really sick, or that perhaps he should be willing to be tracked by his new employee GPS locating thing in a vague hint that he wasn't in the hospital reminds me of some of the more outlandish stuff about Steve Jobs in the last years of his life.
He's just a guy, and sometimes people get sick. It doesn't spell doom and gloom, or a sudden change in fortune or prophetic suggestion about the company's fortunes. It just means the local chemist will sell a few more Lemsip boxes near his house.
This is news? (Score:5, Informative)
I hate making Steve Jobs references, but I think news media is still hung up on mysterious health issues equaling pancreatic cancer or some similar terminal disease. Dude is unable to talk, and the company reports that it is not serious like most other health issues. For all we know the inability to speak is due to some contagious pathogen and he just wants to lay low so no one gets it, while he gets over it. I'm sure when Page was contemplating taking a leave of absence for a little spell, he didn't realize that he needed a press release to go along with it.
Of course there is the alternative theory could be that Page just had his meditation chamber [wikia.com] installed and he's taking it for a spin. You know, if you're in that camp where Google is evil and all.
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Search giant CEO cant even find own voice, can you trust them to find your information?
Hear more on fox news at 11
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Okay so he's got Laryngitis or something similar.
This,
I've just gotten over a bout of the flu, at best I sounded like a 2 pack a day smoker, at worst you couldn't hear me properly 2 meters away. Its winter here in Oz but its entirely possible that he's just got the common cold, I've come back from the UK winter to Oz summer to get a cold 2 days after getting back.
it's probably just a common infliction that has caused his voice to be less then optimum, not like the cancerous fingers of Steve Jobs are grasping at him from beyond the grave.
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There is the part where it means he won't be able to address customers, shareholders, analysts, press, or the public at the aforementioned "high-profile events." One of those events would be Google I/O, the much-ballyhooed developer event that kicks off in San Francisco next week. I, for one, expected Google's CEO to appear at the keynote to unveil whatever it is they plan to unveil there -- that would seem to be the appropriate way to do it -- but I guess he won't. Page already has something of a reputatio
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What's odd about it is that he's not showing up for these events - not simply avoiding speaking, but not showing/planning to show at all.
I don't think there's a conspiracy though - I think it's just burn-out. The dude's gotten so far from where he's started and he's really got no way back. Happens to people who find themselves shoehorned into management when what they really want to be doing is tech.
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Reputation (Score:3)
Don't worry about health of billionaires. (Score:3)
Billionaires get GREAT heath care
Worry about everyone else's health care.
Larry has backup (Score:3)
If Larry can't speak, it's not big deal to send in Sergey or Eric Schmidt. That's an advantage to rule by triumvirate. No single leader is indispensable. That is in sharp contrast to Apple where Steve Jobs was believed to be the on true voice and visionary of the company.
A suggestion (Score:1)
He just needs to stop smoking those $1000 bills.
Nothing wrong that a good ____ won't take care of? (Score:2)
This sounds like a setup for a mediocre one liner:
"There is nothing seriously wrong with me, that a good _______ won't take care of"
Any suggestions . . . ? Google itself offered me this:
"there is nothing wrong with me that a little chocolate won't fix"
I am confident that Slashdotters are puerile enough to come up with something better.
Looks like they're trying to copy Apple again (Score:3)
Live fast, die young, leave an emaciated corpse (Score:2)
It's the Steve Jobs / Randy Pausch ("Last Lecture") effect. Relatively young, highly successful computing type suddenly laid low by pancreatic cancer. Folks can't help but speculate.
I'm not surprised (Score:2)
That's what happens to your throat when you eat Ice Cream Sandwich too much! Together with Frozen Yogurt!