FOIA: NSA Contracts Stored In Paper Files, Unsearchable, Unindexed 114
v3rgEz writes "Wish you were a little more organized? Have trouble finding that archived contract when you actually need it? Don't feel too bad: The National Security Agency has the same problem, claiming that its contract database is stored manually and impossible to search by topic, category, or even by vendor in most cases."
Re:I have this marvellous new invention for you! (Score:5, Funny)
It's called a Hollerith card tabulating machine. I can make you a good price!
NSA PROCUREMENT OFFICE (EQUIPMENT DIVISION)
Mr. Kyosuke:
Thank you for your recent letter offering a good price on a Hollerith machine. I regret to inform you that the NSA already has several of these in its possession that were purchased at an IBM auction of surplus machines [wikipedia.org] that had been leased to the German government [huffingtonpost.com] in the 1940s. We have made many custom improvements to the German machines over the years and would not think of wasting them on something as trivial as contracts.
However, as replacement parts for these machines are in short supply and knowledge of their purpose is a forgotten state secret we have sent agents from the Procurement Office (Human Division) to collect you and your machine. They are at your front and back doors now. Please cooperate with them fully to make this easier on everyone.
Again, thank you for contacting the NSA and helping us keep you safe.
Re:There really know why... (Score:4, Funny)
How do you computer? (Score:2, Funny)
It should be expected. The NSA has very little technical savvy, nor any sizable budget for computer equipment. They're too busy doing their jobs, to worry about extracting useful information out of data.