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Google CEO Larry Page Says "Nothing Seriously Wrong" 88

Posted by timothy
from the just-going-a-bit-tessier-ashpool dept.
After Larry Page bowed out from some public appearances, reader Pigskin-Referee writes with the news that "Google Inc Chief Executive Larry Page has reassured employees about his health, but the company on Friday shed little additional light on an unspecified condition affecting his voice that will sideline him from two high-profile events in the coming weeks. Page told employees in an email on Thursday that there was 'nothing seriously wrong with me,' according to a source who had seen an internal staff memo. The 39-year-old Google co-founder sat out his company's annual shareholders' meeting on Thursday because he had 'lost his voice,' according to Google Executive Chairman Eric Schmidt, who informed attendees of the news at the start of the event."
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Google CEO Larry Page Says "Nothing Seriously Wrong"

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  • by Anonymous Coward

    Isn't that what Steve Jobs said in the beginning too?

  • by Anonymous Coward
    Poor Larry Page stubs his toe and Slashdot has it as front page news.

    What else 'matters' for fucks sake.

    Don't tell me there isn't a serious mancrush going on here.
  • I hate shareholders (Score:5, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday June 23, 2012 @11:35AM (#40421155)

    "Oh. My. GOD. HE'S NOT IMMORTAL! He suffers minor illnesses like we do! THE COMPANY IS DOOMED! DOOMED! DOOOOOOOOOOMED! Somebody reassure us he's not dead already! HE'S BEEN DEAD ALL ALONG, HASN'T HE?!? Why do these terrible things have to happen to us? Whyyyyyyyyyyyy"

    God, do I hate shareholders.

    • by ArchieBunker (132337) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @12:05PM (#40421371) Homepage

      Honestly I'm convinced you could replace a typical CEO with either a monkey or magic 8 ball and get similar results.

      • by timeOday (582209) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @12:14PM (#40421413)
        It's not fair to say that about Larry Page though. He invented page-rank and co-founded google. They were college students and made their own servers in pizza boxes. The worthless CEOs come in later, demanding the same pay as the founders who built the company from nothing.
      • by kiwimate (458274) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @03:00PM (#40422439) Journal

        And I'm honestly convinced that if the typical Slashdotter or man-on-the-street who makes this kind of asinine comment were given free rein to replace a typical CEO they'd decimate the company's value within a month, if they didn't have half the top executives resign first.

        What do you think it actually takes to run a company? Tell me - if it's that easy, this should be trivial. Here, I'll get you started:

        * Knowledge of accounting - yes, you need this no matter what industry you're in. You simply MUST understand capital versus expense, A/R and A/P, GAPP, ratios, asset depreciation, etc. Yes, you have a CFO - but you'd better know what they're talking about
        * Knowledge of risk management.
        * Extremely detailed and extremely broad knowledge of the industry you're in.

        • by kiwimate (458274) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @03:04PM (#40422465) Journal

          Okay, starting again...

          * Knowledge of accounting - yes, you need this no matter what industry you're in. You simply MUST understand capital versus expense, A/R and A/P, GAPP, ratios, asset depreciation, etc. Yes, you have a CFO - but you'd better know what they're talking about
          * Knowledge of risk management.
          * Extremely detailed and extremely broad knowledge of the industry you're in.
          * Knowledge of the *market* of your industry
          * Strong analytics
          * Strong skills in prioritizing
          * Ability to explain very technical aspects of your industry to the layman
          * Strategic wisdom
          * Be a motivator
          * Know where to ask for answers if you don't have them
          * Ability to keep your mouth shut when necessary (talking to politicians and lobbyists, for instance)

          • I've seen my fair share of CEOs, in both megacorporations and tiny ones. Guess how many of those bullet points even the best of them actually has? I make it... two. And I'm being optimistic. What you're listing there is a wishlist, not typical reality.

            Or are you honestly going to sit there and tell me "Developers developers developers developers" was motivating?
          • by Raenex (947668)

            Extremely detailed and extremely broad knowledge of the industry you're in.

            Is that why you get these vastly overpaid "superstar" CEOs that move from industry to industry? CEOs are incredibly overpaid for the supply and demand for their position, probably for a few reasons.

            One, it's a single position so the company can afford to spend a lot. Two, there's a lot of quid pro quo going on with the foxes guarding the henhouse.

            And three, people aren't good judges of how valuable a person really is, along with the psychology that the CEO is an important position, so it must be worth lots

      • Everything would be different, after all, the Magic 8-Ball has always known... Outlook not so good...

  • no voice.. (Score:5, Funny)

    by TheGratefulNet (143330) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @11:42AM (#40421207)

    no voice means Page has been reduced to ... (puts on sunglasses) ... a paragraph!

    • So.. does he have to make a stupid pun whenever he toggles his shades, or does he just toggle his shades whenever a snarky pun about the victim of the week comes to mind?

      The former would explain why he wears them indoors so much, but then again, so would the glass-walled police station with huge banks of yellow lamps all over the place.

  • IRC (Score:4, Funny)

    by K. S. Kyosuke (729550) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @11:44AM (#40421225)
    Why can't the channel op voice him again?
    • by Crasoose (1621969)
      Maybe his fingers are broken too, that would explain why he hasn't posted any updates to his Google+ in a month.
  • Robot speak (Score:5, Insightful)

    by WilyCoder (736280) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @11:47AM (#40421253)

    Lost his voice? That doesn't seem to make Hawking miss any meetings...

    • by mcavic (2007672)
      Yeah, but can you imagine Larry Page giving a meeting in Hawking's voice?
      • To be honest, it wouldn't be much different than his normal voice. Maybe he'd sound a little more robotic than froggy, I guess.

  • is that he is in charge of jumping the shark with google.

  • The suggestions that he wasn't really sick, or that perhaps he should be willing to be tracked by his new employee GPS locating thing in a vague hint that he wasn't in the hospital reminds me of some of the more outlandish stuff about Steve Jobs in the last years of his life.

    He's just a guy, and sometimes people get sick. It doesn't spell doom and gloom, or a sudden change in fortune or prophetic suggestion about the company's fortunes. It just means the local chemist will sell a few more Lemsip boxes near his house.

  • This is news? (Score:5, Informative)

    by slack_justyb (862874) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @12:05PM (#40421373)
    Okay so he's got Laryngitis or something similar. Why the hell are people thinking this is news? I get Laryngitis from acid reflux from time to time, a couple of weeks Zantec usually clears it up, and I'm good for like the rest of the year.

    I hate making Steve Jobs references, but I think news media is still hung up on mysterious health issues equaling pancreatic cancer or some similar terminal disease. Dude is unable to talk, and the company reports that it is not serious like most other health issues. For all we know the inability to speak is due to some contagious pathogen and he just wants to lay low so no one gets it, while he gets over it. I'm sure when Page was contemplating taking a leave of absence for a little spell, he didn't realize that he needed a press release to go along with it.

    Of course there is the alternative theory could be that Page just had his meditation chamber [wikia.com] installed and he's taking it for a spin. You know, if you're in that camp where Google is evil and all.
    • by Anonymous Coward

      Search giant CEO cant even find own voice, can you trust them to find your information?

      Hear more on fox news at 11

    • by mjwx (966435)

      Okay so he's got Laryngitis or something similar.

      This,

      I've just gotten over a bout of the flu, at best I sounded like a 2 pack a day smoker, at worst you couldn't hear me properly 2 meters away. Its winter here in Oz but its entirely possible that he's just got the common cold, I've come back from the UK winter to Oz summer to get a cold 2 days after getting back.

      it's probably just a common infliction that has caused his voice to be less then optimum, not like the cancerous fingers of Steve Jobs are grasping at him from beyond the grave.

    • by PCM2 (4486)

      There is the part where it means he won't be able to address customers, shareholders, analysts, press, or the public at the aforementioned "high-profile events." One of those events would be Google I/O, the much-ballyhooed developer event that kicks off in San Francisco next week. I, for one, expected Google's CEO to appear at the keynote to unveil whatever it is they plan to unveil there -- that would seem to be the appropriate way to do it -- but I guess he won't. Page already has something of a reputatio

    • What's odd about it is that he's not showing up for these events - not simply avoiding speaking, but not showing/planning to show at all.

      I don't think there's a conspiracy though - I think it's just burn-out. The dude's gotten so far from where he's started and he's really got no way back. Happens to people who find themselves shoehorned into management when what they really want to be doing is tech.

    • by tomhath (637240)
      Larry Page has Laryngitis...hehe
  • by slasho81 (455509) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @12:18PM (#40421451)
    I'd have doubts if this statement came from almost any other CEO of a major company. But I believe Page.
  • by leftie (667677) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @12:31PM (#40421527)

    Billionaires get GREAT heath care

    Worry about everyone else's health care.

  • by erice (13380) on Saturday June 23, 2012 @01:05PM (#40421777) Homepage

    If Larry can't speak, it's not big deal to send in Sergey or Eric Schmidt. That's an advantage to rule by triumvirate. No single leader is indispensable. That is in sharp contrast to Apple where Steve Jobs was believed to be the on true voice and visionary of the company.

  • by Anonymous Coward

    He just needs to stop smoking those $1000 bills.

  • This sounds like a setup for a mediocre one liner:

    "There is nothing seriously wrong with me, that a good _______ won't take care of"

    Any suggestions . . . ? Google itself offered me this:

    "there is nothing wrong with me that a little chocolate won't fix"

    I am confident that Slashdotters are puerile enough to come up with something better.

  • First Jobs kicks the bucket and now Page has to. Do they have no shame?
  • It's the Steve Jobs / Randy Pausch ("Last Lecture") effect. Relatively young, highly successful computing type suddenly laid low by pancreatic cancer. Folks can't help but speculate.

  • That's what happens to your throat when you eat Ice Cream Sandwich too much! Together with Frozen Yogurt!

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